Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Harry Hotspur Has Moved to!

Harry Hotspur has moved to OleOle!
Please update your bookmarks:

Some of you may be aware I was wanting to give this blog a proper web site. I found the process pretty tedious and the rewards were frankly mixed. It became evident to me you can hemorrhage money and still produce results that a 'rather dull child could have drawn while attempting a graveyard in the moonlight'. Blogger is limiting but at the same time very friendly... Mmmn.

Then along came

5000 teams catered for in more languages than Denholm Ellliot spoke in Indiana Jones &The Temple Of Doom. A truly massive football site crammed with dedicated zones and a truly blinding array of widgets.

Live Scores and Live Match Reports of Premiership, Primera, Seria A, International and MLS games. In fact, under one roof you can keep up to speed with every bloody team and competition in the known world.

There are endless forums for those of you who wish to eat each other. Podcasts and a Fantasy Football competition with real prizes like tickets to the Euros Final. $20,000's worth in total.

There's a video zone where you can upload your choice. So if Dannyboy wants to inflict every bloody piece of Hoddle footage in existence on planet earth on us and I hope he does, he can.

There's a photo gallery. Facebook and others were creaking with dozens of 'Our Day Out At Wembley.' lost in largely unviewed photo albums. Endless snaps of grinning mentalists photographing each other on the train, then random out of focus shots of the sky and some people who might have been even playing football. Now these historical artifacts can be given a real home.

Look, there is so much on offer here. My advice is get stuck in. I've so much confidence in this operation I've signed a three year deal.

This is the future.

Brian Potter wanted to create sunshine indoors for the people of Bolton. This is a global football equivalent of that man's dream.

The new address will be...

Sunday, June 01, 2008

Dos Santos To Sign In A Matter Of Days...

Shout when you can see him...

The Spanish are indicating that the light at the end of the tunnel is indeed light and not as some of us were beginning to feel, the front of an oncoming train.

Giovani Dos Santos will come with the usual endlessly tiered contract dependent upon the usual variables of appearances, goals, Super Mario Kart Hi Scores etc.

The player's agent is said to have been busily sparring with THFC bean counters earlier week and this thing could be resolved as soon as tomorrow. Monday.

The agent has said, "The project is promising and has offered Giovani ambitious and wants to become great in the Tottenham and helping the team to be. . It is true that to leave the club this is a risky decision, but for his qualities seem to be the best option for him." Which doesn't sound too awful, as agent pronouncements go.

The player's father is quoted as saying, "it is an honor that teams such as Tottenham are set in Giovani, but there is nothing official yet but is well under way." Which is again optimistic enough fare for any Spurs fan, I would've thought.

Interesting snippet to all this is that the father goes on to remark that the ankle injury to his boy is now good and the recovery ought meet the dealines.


Saturday, May 31, 2008

Spurs May Yet Come Undunne

There may have been a 'slight snag'

Harry Redschnapps is trying to ruin a Daily Mail exclusive!
An alleged medical has been allegedly postponed as a result.

"I like Richard Dunne. I think he's a top player but I think there's a couple of clubs in for him at the moment, but I think we've got as good a chance as anyone now." said 'Arry.

Pompey are by their own admission 'in' for Dunne. Newcastle's name is being bandied about, but my view is that 'bandied' is about the size of it.

There is an added dimension to this of course in so much that mouths in Portsmouth have expressed an interest in Kaboul. A player as we know who has been very vocal about wanting to join Pompey...

Which player would you take?

Keano is said to be "really pushing him hard." This is a family show and consequently I am appalled at the thought of this sort of thing taking place, ahem, unless it's consentual, of course.

This is the same Keane who failed to convince Duff to bring his good self our own injury table, by the way...

Friday, May 30, 2008

A Veritable Torrent Of Triffic Transfer Tales...

Wilson: Can't be too careful nowadays, y'know? Lot of "tea leaves" about, know what I mean?
Warehouse Foreman: Excuse me?
Wilson: Tea leaves... thieves.

Here is what I got.

Bostock I have no info on and whilst I sincerely hope he's another Bale in terms of quality, I am nervous that the Internet attention to this signing has been blown out of proportion due to the Club's clamp down on leaks...

Capel. Allegedly a bid has gone in. I submit it was tendered by a man wearing oven gloves.

Dos Santos. A chap called Jasper on Spurs Odious is positively gushing information that specifically says we are the Club that has stormed in with an offer in proper order. Which is to say the lump of the lolly up front. He adds that Inter et al are sniffing but only with HP bids. I have had only one email to confirm this, but the sender has, so far, yet to be wrong... So...

Dunne. A brand new source emailed earlier this week and was SCREAMING this was going to happen. Now the Daily Flail are running it. Me? I hope so. He's NOT world class, but for the love of... he is would be what I would expect as a squad player from here on in. I have dear reader, high hopes for us, y'see.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Hot Gossip & Pans People. Okay...Lennon & Benty Off

The choice of Anon 9.37 and many a (metal) guru before and after him...

And here's what I have for you, my dears...

Lennon may well be sold.

Bottom line is Moniz (yes, skills coach to the stars and it is rumoured, Martin Jol's Ham & Burger Army) feels the winged heeled one isn’t improving and we have given him a lot of time and he’s still not taking it in and delivering on the pitch. So word is Senior Ramos won't hesitate in selling whilst his market his value is still high.

FLASHHEART: Oh, that's a piece of luck. Thought I'd landed sausage-side! Ha!
And so may Darren Bent be yet.

Franz Carr, has been asked to broker a deal for Bent to Hamburg. A fee of £11m has been agreed and he now has the option of moving out to the Fatherland.

All I can say is you heard it here... at some point.

I see some bloke on Spurs Odious is saying we haven't had any bids in for Berbatov. Loyal reader, be assured as a result, I have handed matters over to my attorneys at law, Darth Vader & Sons this very evening. How very dare they.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Berba's Flim Flam Earns Him A Bloody Good Telling Off

Tell Mitka and Whassisface they can both **** right off, will you? Cheers love.

'Berbatov refused to comment the question of the day about his future and didn't reveal if he's going to stay at Tottenham or to move to one of the numerous European grands, which show interest towards him.'

So says Bulgarian journo Kristalina Ilieva.

"Let's wait. We wait to see how the summer will go on. I want a lot of things, but you should ask my manager Emil Danchev. I do not want to be speculated with my word, I do not want to talk." Berbatov says.

So for those of us still awake, the costermonger's biatch is now not just 'merely a child in these matters' but complicit in the charade. You don't want to talk? That's alright, Harry's feeling chatty enough for the both of us.

Listen up, you little Blagoevgradian Burk. Be under no illusion, we're on to you.

We aren't just punters. This club is ours and we, sweetheart, are in deep.

The unfortunate reality is that a man say, like Teemu Tainio, is worth ten of you in terms of what he feels he owes us, but he can only ever give us in terms of 'goals n' magic' a fifth of what you can deliver.

I love what you did/can do for us, but am appalled that we are now indulging your coy whoring. You see, me, we were waiting for you to break cover and reveal... something.

Levy, get this EMPLOYEE in check. What should I tell you? That a growing number of us don't want THFC being used as a shop window from window to window by this down at heel Danubian Double Act. I know you know and I don't mean to patronise. But If I don't bark at you, it's the moon.

Bayonet fixed, HH.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Enquries Made: Thomas Kahlenberg

We are making enquiries about Auxerre's and sometime Danish International attacking midfielder, Thomas Kahlenberg.

Twenty five years of age, six foot tall and all his own teeth. He is fit, fast, technically sound and would translate into the Premiership without any great fuss. If this is one is on the cards, then get him in. He went to the French side for £2.5 million in 2005 so one might expect to land him for ooh say, an amount in excess of that figure.

Cue obligatory showreel...