Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Tottenham Hotspur: A Song For Benty

Looking around on You Tube, I heard a Charlton chant, 'Darren Bent, Bent, Bent' as in... Ian Wr*ght, Wr*ght, Wr*ght...

Surely we can come up with something less.... less reminiscent of
him and more about Bent and US!

Areas of obvious inspiration include the West Ham snub, although that will sound flat when we're playing anyone else...

Come On You ......LOT

Give us a chant...

Bonus footage - Just found this... Is it real?????


Anonymous said...

nwa (straight out of compton )

Straight out of Ipswitch
Crazy mutha fu*ker call Darren


Anonymous said...

How about:

We are crap, our new signing is crap and the only decent striker we had we sold and he came back to knock us out of whatever piss ant european cup we failed in.

sorry it doesnt rhyme.

Anonymous said...

Yido, Yido, Yido!

Anonymous said...

hes tall
hes a yid
he cost 16 million quid
darren bent darren bent

Anonymous said...

To the tune of Amy Whinehouse

'They tried to make go to West Ham but he said no no no.'

Anonymous said...

we all agree darren is more bent than cambell lol
jh ??????

Anonymous said...

West Ham are all w@nkers,
They wear claret and blue,
When they tried to sign Bent,
He turned and said fu[k you...

To tune of "Posh Spice is a Slapper. She wears a wonderbra...."

Anonymous said...

205 :)

London_Guy said...

Ahhhhh anonymous 1:59 another unhappy Arsenal Fan. I just love it, they lose Henry coz he can see where Arsenal are headed and we sign Bent because he can see where we are headed.

Moe Arsenal Fans comments please, I just love those sick as a parrot posts.


Anonymous said...

the amy winehouse chant is a cracker, absolute diamond- spread the word fellas! great work!

Anonymous said...

What about the Kooks song She "Moves In Her Own Way" for Berbatov?

"I love Berbatov
He scores in every game"

Anonymous said...

how about to the tune of: "do-do-do-didier zokora"



Anonymous said...

Nice and simple (to Andy Coles Tune)...

Darren Bent, Darrent Bent.....Darren Darren Bent.

He gets the ball and then he scores, Darren Darren Bent!

Anonymous said...

amy wine house is a great one but it might sound better with they tried to make me go to west ham but i said jol jol jol
patty boy

Anonymous said...

To the 90s dance tune..no no nah nah no no nah nah no no nah nah theres no limit!....

Bent Bent, Darren Bent Bent, Darren Bent Bent, Darren Hes a Yiddo

No No he said No No He Said No No He Said No to Eggert!


yidage said...

the tune goes, D.I.S.C.O , D.I.S.C.O. and so on change it to BENTS A Y.I.D.YID.O , BENTS A Y.I.D.YID.O lol ryhmes a bit

Anonymous said...

(To the tune of "Stuck in the Middle with you")

Well I don't know why the Hammers thought he'd signed,
At Upton Park there was nothing that shined,
So he joined the Yids further up the road,
Because winning was his ultimate goal,
Berba to the left of him,
Keano to the right,
Here he is,
Darren Bent, Spurs through and through.

:) Ben

Anonymous said...

To the tune of "Campbell loves Barrymore"

Levy's wallet took a dent,
when we signed Darren Bent!

photobanks said...

How about...

Darrent Bent, Darrent Bent.....
He comes from Englerland...
He turned down 70 GRAND
Darren Bent, Darren Bent!!

Brian Clark said...

to the tune of Star Wars Imperial March...

D-D-D-Dar-ren Bent, Dar-ren Bent...D-D-D-Dar-ren Bent, Dar-ren Bent.

Anonymous said...

Super, Super Daz
Super, Super Daz
Super, Super Daz...
Super Darren Bent!

Anonymous said...

2.33 shocking

Anonymous said...

I like that Amy Whinehouse version above

'They tried to make him go to West Ham but he said no no no.'

Simply hilarious =D

Anonymous said...

What about,to the tune of Queen's 'We will rock you'

(the famous handclapping)
"Darren Bent will rock you"
(the famous handclapping)

or maybe if we get a bonecrunching defender (ala Davids) it could be for them as:

"????? ???? will crock you"

Anonymous said...

You guys should stick to your day jobs...

sidyid said...

This site just gets better!

It's a Spurs Thing!

ginjag said...

Absolutely love the Amy Winehouse one...classic!

Love the site HH...keep up the good work

cheddar green said...

Defo the winehouse one! and for the whole version...

they tried to make me go to west ham but i said jol jol jol

Eggerts a prick the paedo is sick im with jol jol jol...

i want to win the league,

not be relegated at speed,

they tried to make me go to west ham and i said jol jol jol.

cheddar green said...

they tried to make me go to west ham i said jol jol jol,

Eggerts a prock the paedo is sick im with jol jol jol,

i want to win the league,

not be relegated at speed,

they tried to make me go to west ham i said jol jol jol,

Anonymous said...

To the tune of the The Arctic Monkeys - "When the sun goes down":

I said, who's that over there?
To me its no surprise
that he HAD to join the yids
He don't need major credit cards
I doubt he checks receipts
He's all quite legitimate!

And what a proper man
Just give him half a chance
I bet he'll score one, yes he can
Can see it in his eyes, yeah
That he's got a speeding ban
To unlock and trouble defenders

WE paid big change for him to mow you down
North of the river going out of town
WE paid big change for him to mow you down
Darren Bent
Darren Bent

Anonymous said...

The Amy Whinehouse 1 is a classic!

'They tried 2 make him go 2 west ham but he said no no no!
Yes they are crap so he turned his back....he loves jol jol jol!' etc etc

Also lovin the berbatov 2 the tune of She "Moves In Her Own Way"

'Oh woh oh, we love berbatov
he scores in every game!
Oh woh oh he came 2 the prem 2 play at white heart lane! etc etc

Summerspur said...

Who's that boy they"re calling benty,

Who's that boy they all adore.

hes turned the hammers down,

To play in the north of town.

Keep your money, I'm a yiddo not a whore.

Anonymous said...

they tried to make me go to west ham but i said no no no
my name is darren bent and im a yiddo yiddo yiddo

chiefy said...

we don't even have a decent one for berbatov.

any songs need to be two lines long maximum or feature a bit of arsenal slagging, otherwise people give up...only need to hear our efforts at 'its a grand old team to play for'

Anonymous said...

The Winner is:

To the tune of Amy Whinehouse

'They tried to make go to West Ham but he said no no no.'

Anonymous said...

Deer-Deer-Deer-Dar-ren Bent, Dar-ren Bent...Deer-Deer-Deer-Dar-ren Bent, Daar-ren Bent.

to the tune of Star Wars Imperial March is hilarious... even if only for a minute... why did you all over look that puppy? (brian clarke 2:33) it's so stupid it's got to be a winner


Anonymous said...

anon 2.28: I love it!!!! but shouldn't it be Keano to the left, Berbs to the right?

Anonymous said...

Super Darren Bent
Super Darren Bent

He Shoots He Scores

Super Darren Bent!

Harry Hotspur said...

Wharra 'bout..............?

Benty loves Tottenham.

Benty loves the Lane...

Benty we love you!

Anonymous said...

We can see why your a Journo HH...

Brian Clark said...

Continuing my stupidity….

To the tune of Shamen’s “ez-a-good”

Darr-en-Bent, Darr-en-Bent whoooa wooow he’s Darren Bent.

Darr-en-Bent, Darr-en-Bent whoooa wooow he’s Darren Bent.

Summerspur said...

wharra about harry you do what you do well. pretty good transfer speculation and bargain hunting.

your not that orange bloke on telly are you, and i don't mean big fat Ron (race relations board leader) Atkinson.

Brian Clark said...

To continue the madness...

To the tune of Shamen's "ez-a-good"

Darr-en-Bent, Darr-en-Bent whoooa wooow he’s Darren Bent.

Darr-en-Bent, Darr-en-Bent whoooa wooow he’s Darren Bent.

Harry Hotspur said...

So you don't want my version of Berba's got a luvurly bunch o' coconuts, then?

I'm wounded... :)

Harry Hotspur said...

Where's Sidney Wale???

I demand Sidney Wale!

Bring me my Laureate, lol, !

Anonymous said...

Harry You never fail to bring a wry smile to the face of a true yid. If I was judging this extremely important contest of wit, The prize would go to Stuck in the Middle of you only we'd have to listen to it with Michael Madsen carving of one of Eggerts oversize ears

Anonymous said...

To the tune of you are my sunshine:

You are my benty my darren benty you make me happy when skies are grey your better than eduardo and by the way lehmann's gay la la la la la

Anonymous said...

And Guys I haev been trying to get this one out fopr weeks for poor dimitar- To the tune of Deleila (don't know how to spell that crap sorry)

It goes Di- Mi-Tarrrrrrrrrr.......Berba....tov


Ok someone else can make up the rest!

Harry Hotspur said...


You are welcome, as is wry.... Salut.

Anonymous said...

Have you seen that those sad c***s on vital are now all of a sudden running the same thing?????????????????

Harry Hotspur said...

Relax mate, we're all friends...

Yid said...

stuck in the middle with you is brilliant but a bit too long. I hope amy winehouse- rehab sticks, short and sweet

Harry Hotspur said...

So it's half five and we're down to Amy Winehouse....

...or an 'edited' Steeler's Wheel..........

And me just doing the typing which is... a fair call...

I'm sure there's more nonsense out there!!!

Domyid said...

Ledley King needs a decent one!
How bout "Ledley, Ledley, Ledley, Ledley. Ledley is King of White Hart Lane." (Noel Noel or whatever its called - like Hoddles old song)
What u think?

Anonymous said...

shouldn't we come up with a song for like...DAWS before a player who has never even played a game in a spurs shirt?

imo, michael dawson needs a good song!!!

Anonymous said...

yeah ledley needs a good one, iaw domyid, too. haha. defenders never get the glory!

Harry Hotspur said...


Anonymous said...

One for Pascal Chimbonda to the theme of Rhiana's Umbrella ella ella ella.

You can be my Pascal Chimbonda-onda-onda-onda hey hey !

Anonymous said...

he glides he moves he's oh so f**kin smooth Berbatov, Berbatov

Bda Yid

DoubleVision said...

Dawson definately must have a song, how about to the tune of Rudi Rudi Rudi... Micky, Micky, Micky Dawson, lalalalalala Do It, Do It, Do It, Do It. lalalalalala Micky, Micky, Micky Dawson, Kick It, Kick It, Kick It, Kick It. lalalalalala

Anonymous said...

DoubleVision here. Harry your comment posting is coming up in chuffin Czech... Dawson definately must have a song, how about to the tune of Rudi Rudi Rudi... Micky, Micky, Micky Dawson, lalalalalala Do It, Do It, Do It, Do It. lalalalalala Micky, Micky, Micky Dawson, lalalalalala Kick It, Kick It, Kick It, Kick It. lalalalalala

Anonymous said...

he's bent and you know he is
he's bent and you know he is

phil said...

Nicked (AGAIN!) from glory glory...

Dear Mr ,
Thank you for choosing to shop at http://www.littlewoods.com

Below is a summary of your order dated 03/Jul/2007. Your Order reference number is:
Please quote this on any correspondence.




Delivery Address

Expected Delivery

1 Mens Tottenham Hotspur home shirt 2007/08 WZ95517
Thu 5th July
£ 44.10
Order Discount
£ -23.50

Sub Total £ 20.60
Cashback £ 0.00
Delivery £ 0.00
Total Including Delivery £ 20.60

For full details of all our delivery options and tariffs please click here

Wendell said...

could kill two birds with one stone..

He shoots, he scores, the assist just came from Daws
Berbatov, Berbatov


(Brianstorm - Arctic Monkeys)
He's trying to impress McClaren
So kind of you to bless us with your wonder strike
We've paid for when West Ham were rejected

Wendell said...

to the tune of 'Hey Mickey, you're so fine..'

Hey Dawson he's so class, Dawson's never missed a pass
Hey Dawson! Hey Dawson!

Anonymous said...

This has to be the one for Berba!

Nobody does it better
Makes me feel sad for the rest
Nobody does it half as good as you
Berby, you're the best

And nobody does it better
Though sometimes I wish someone could
Nobody does it quite the way you do
Why'd you have to be so good?

Oh, and nobody does it better
Makes me feel sad for the rest
Nobody does it half as good as you
Berby, Berby, Dimitar, you're the best

Anonymous said...

He's big
He's Bent
His arse is up for rent !!

NYCSPURS said...

had to get involved sorry if i sent this more than once pc is fed:
1) Ledley King
"glory glory ledley ki---IIIng........and the king goes marching on..."
2)Mitko Berbs (to the tune of bros!)
"How does berbs, does berbs keep scoring?"
"hes a genius - hes a genius"
(apologies for that 1 in advance)
3)Darren Bent (to dead or alive!!!)
You make them spin around, benty
Right round its too easy benty,
Right round round round
(also bad)
4)Michael Dawson - the clash rock the casbah:
The[goons/mancs/scum]don't like him
Michael Dawson
Micky Dawson/****in awesome

Favourite one i read was "straight out of ipswich" NWA

Harry Hotspur said...

nyc welcome, friend...

Anonymous said...

They tried to make him go to West Ham he said no no no

Bent to the Lane, Henry to Spain, I say ho ho ho

Bermuda yid

Anonymous said...

Another one from me (I wrote the "Stuck in the Middle" effort).

(To the tune of Inspiral Carpet's "This is how it feels to be lonely", Bent is implied rather than mentioned)

So this is how it feels to be West Ham,
This is how it feels to be small,
This is how it feels when players won't sign for you at all.

:) Ben

Anonymous said...

how about ( to the tune of kaiser chiefs: Ruby)

Dimi Dimi Dimi Dimi ahhhhhhhhhh Do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya, ahhhhhhhhhh, wanna score another for me ahhhhhhhhhh, dimi, dimi, dimi, dimi ahhhhhhhh

NYCSPURS said...

i left out my 5th song mate," 1 harry hotspur, theres only 1 harry hotspur..."

NYCSPURS said...

those 2 were good! stuck in the middle might shade it - anyway, hopefully well need another 4 or 5 new songs over the summer. "...u are my sniejder, my only sneijder....."

Harry Hotspur said...

Ben you're golden......... get stuck in

Anonymous said...

(to the tune of her name was Lola)

His name is Dawson
Plays in the center
If he brakes your xxxkin leg
he never meant ta

Bda Yid

Anonymous said...

hes bent ,hes queer ,he runs fast from the rear darren bent - darren bent

Anonymous said...

Keano Keano there's only one Keano...

Ripped off from Man Yoo

How about to tune of Oasis ''Do you know I mean ''

''All my people right here right now..Robbie Keane yeah yeah''

Lord Law said...

New song for Berbatov...to the tune of "Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen"

O Di-mi-tar Berb-a-tov ...
you have such great skill.
You make all the defenders
opposing us feel ill.
Your silky hair...
Your brilliant flair...
We love you all here!
O Di-mi-tar Berb-a-tov, Berb-a-tov,
O Di-mi-tar Berb-a-tov

Boro Yiddo said...

If you want a second for Zokora?

Adora Zakora.......
dodododododododo etc

to the tune of Kia ora ads

Boro Yiddo said...

He's young, he's fast,
Said "West Ham, up your arse"

Darren Bent, Darren Bent

Anonymous said...

what about: hes big, he's class, he turned down upton park, darren bent darren bent

the turned down upton park could be changed to : he pissed on upton park

or what about: he's tall, he's quick, he said curbishly suck my dick, darren bent darren bent

or: he's big, his fast, he said curbishly kiss my arse.........

Anonymous said...

the old hoddle chant for ledley would be good;

'Ledley Ledley, Ledley Ledley, long live the King of Whit Hart Lane'

I like the Lennon chant ive heard down the bricklayers, but needs slight editing imo;
You are my Lennon, My Aaron Lennon,
you play your football the tottenham way,
youre better value the thoe walcott, and by the way Rsol camp*** is gay!!!

as for bent i like the amy winehouse 1 but we could also use; (to the tune of the pikeys tribute to freddie eastwood) da da da da Bents a yiddo, da da da da.....

as for thierry gone-ry maybe;
Thiery ooooooooo
theriy ooooooooo
he left the arsenal, cos there gonna win fukall

EL said...

Summerspur's trad styled "who that boy they're calling Benty" comes a close 2nd to the hip mod Amy Winehouse gem for me. Harry, nice blog, shame about the song. But i'll not cop out, here's my beer fueled late night attempt at finishing anon 4.14pm's Delilah intro....

Diiimiiitaar Ber-ba-tov...

de de dadadadadadadaaa

Diiimiiitaaaaar Ber-ba-tov...

de de dadadadadadadaaaa...

You caaant get close..
He tippy toes past you and scores..

Forgive Dimi Berba for making your team look so poor...

Oh shut up I'm tired!

EL said...

Just spotted nycspurs' rock the casbah/Michael Dawson song. Works well, 3rd place for me. Are you sending out ribons & certificates Harry?

Anonymous said...

Michael Dawson - the clash rock the casbah:
The[goons/mancs/scum]don't like him
Michael Dawson
Micky Dawson/****in awesome

Taking it further

He's a yid and we like him
Michael Dawson Michael Dawson
The scum don't like him
Michael Dawson F'in awesome

Anonymous said...

Well done guys the winner gotta be winehouse tune

(the whole version...

they tried to make me go to west ham but i said no no no

Eggerts a prick the paedo is sick im with jol jol jol...

i want to win the league,

not be relegated at speed,

they tried to make me go to west ham and i said jol jol jol.)

Anonymous said...

To the tune of Steve Bulls a tatter:

Darren Bents a yiddo
He's got an england cap.
He plays for tottenhamhotspur
and is a lovely chap.
He'll score with his left foot
he'll score with his right.
And when he plays the Scum
He'll score all fcuking night

Anonymous said...

The Pet Shop Boys -

I Love You You Pay My Rent

"I love you, you're Darren Bent"

EL said...

Dearest Harry,

I'm disappointed to see that you haven't got back to me with a midfielder prediction. Is the pressure to be right yet again just too much? I have no doubt it's all going on behind the scenes but even the silly papers are running out of stories. When does the window close by the way, anyone know?

Anonymous said...

Lasagne! Woah... Lasagne! Woah...
We laughed ourselves to bits.
When tottenham got the shits...


have you ever seen tottenham win the league?

Harry Hotspur said...


The midfield eh? Well the word on the street is that we've put in 5 mill for Drenthe + Ghaly...

But Chelsea have gone in with 7 mill euros + the loan of I don't know who.. Clearly the Cheatski bid is lower but who knows where these kids want to play?

Could well be cobblers so....

TAD said...

To the tune of 'He's only a poor little sparrow...'

'Oh the Spammers put up 18 million
and offered him 70 grand
but Bent turned em down
and went across town
to join the best club in the land....'

iveseyid said...

Good work guys.

But how about:

"Let's go Darren Bent-all, let's go Dareen Bent-al, la la la la, etc"?

Anonymous said...

Ive got a piss take song for Chelsea,

to the tune of "one arron lennon"

"Team with a girls name
Your just a team with a girls name
Team with a giiiiirls name
Your just a team with a giiiiirls name."

all together now....

copyright joe!

Anonymous said...

Lovin the Amy Winehouse one so lets hope it takes off. Can see that getting a laugh from other teams as well.

I saw this suggestion on another site for Ledley and loved it but don't think it's been used at the Lane. It was suggested we find him his own song as the Judas scum one is getting a bit tired now. The thought was the national anthem simply changed to "God Save our Ledley King, long live our Ledley King" etc etc

TooManyDaves said...

He's here,
He's Bent,
He cost us more than rent,
Darren Bent, Darren Bent

jolsgonemental said...

anyone booked online tickets yet?

cant select what individual seat you want - only the stand.

is this only for preseason or some sort of fan conning fuck off to force an upgrade to some new shitty member scheme for 90 quid a season?

Summerspur said...

jolsgonemental is right.
tried booking torino, fancied nice bit of front row anywhere with me popcorn and maltesers and it wanted to stick us in block zzz row 1 million or some such crazy nonsense.

Harry Hotspur said...

That's rubbish, I don't want to told where to sit.

I'm emailing the club.

jolsgonemental managed to oust Jol back in May by this route, so I'm confident that getting the ticketing sorted ought to be a walk in the park..

Harry Hotspur said...

Sent them this:

Hi there,

Having just gone online to buy a seat for a game, I see you now are selling random seats from within a specified block.

Customers are no longer able to choose their seat.

Can you confirm that this is now your standard operating procedure for the new season, or is this just for the friendlies?

I look forward to a speedy reply!

Kind regards,

Mrs Larry Grayson

Anonymous said...

To the tune of: "hey ho the merry o"

West Ham to hell he sent,
At Spurs he is content,
He'll score us ma..ny goals
His name is Darrent Bent.

Anonymous said...

Well hello there Mrs Grayson!

Anonymous said...

That Amy Winehouse one is pure class.

Summerspur said...

Well a song for benty has unearthed some genuine talent out there, and perhaps some not quite so gifted. In our search for instant fame and stardom we seem to have overlooked a far more serious issue.
I am not referring to latest transfer gossip, ground relocation or the possibility of a new burger van.

No, the matter of a far more grave nature i refer to is the whereabouts of knowfuckall. According to my calculations the "fat lady" has been singing for nigh on a fortnight now and sofea jane and her pussy are also a matter of great concern.

Harry do you think you could arrange for his fat lady to sing some of the wonderful "songs for benty" in a eurovision style song contest with you as our very own terry wogan?

jolsgonemental said...

This is my own ditty.

To the tune of live forever by oasis

'I know youre all paedophiles
I can see it in your smiles

You Dirty Goons are going go to jail.'

its got fuck all to do with Darren Bent but to be honest if my name was 'bent' i probably wouldnt want it sung.

dannyboy said...

anyway......Defoe has come out and quoted as saying he fully intends staying at spurs and fighting for his space. YES !!! 4 quality strikers to start the season - Mido, fuck off you lardarse.
All the Defoe doubters - where u at ???


Anonymous said...

To be sung to the tune of F*** em all, F***em all

Darren Bent, Darren Bent

He must surely have been heaven sent,

He scores with his left foot and scores with his right

He's got the pace and the power and the might,

Darren Bent, Darren Bent.............

Cheers COYS Ledleythlithp

Anonymous said...

every paper seems to talk about spurs' 4 strikers.. what happened to Mido? has he finally left or has everybody just started ignoring him regardless lol

Anonymous said...

I’m not really one for these wild rumours – my mates, uncle’s, friends, son said he say player x at Old Trafford today etc BUT I have been informed by a friend that Manchester United have booked Berbatov in for a medical at BUPA in Salford Quays for some time in the next week. If this is true then he could be on his way to OT.

Anonymous said...

Harry, Kaboul had signed.

Anonymous said...

Man U do their medicals at Carrington. Numpty.

Anonymous said...

There isn't a BUPA hospital in Salford Quays. Just their head office. So unless he has an interview for an admin job with them I cannot see this being true.

Anonymous said...

So, Kaboul is in the bag.
I for one would really like to know who the hell is Sofea Jane. I distinctively recall her writing here a month ago that Spurs would buy two players: one for 16 million, the other for 8 million. Well, Bent and Kaboul.
So, where's your final comment on Berbatov? Word is out Tevez is going to ManU. What happened to Berba's deal? Is it off? Why?Or is he going and the medical is already booked?
Com'on, lady. We're waiting.

Anonymous said...

So Mr Hotspur's 3rd 'done deal' signing turns up at the Lane. Where the fcuk are all those dippy Harry slaggers now then? Sulking over the loss of their prissy little dancing peacock to barca no doubt.

chelski can piss off with their attempts to de-stablize Chimbonda as well.

Genius left back, france under 21 captain and a top drawer premiership goalscorer all in then. Just a quality midfielder or two and we're more than ready for a proper assault on the top 4 or even better if the midfield gets good enough.

Five and a half weeks and counting.


Anonymous said...

oh how boring!!!! Berbatov is NOT going anywhere! (I hope) I wish people would stop these rumours already, its pathetic

Joe said...

Kaboul signs! Another one in the bag in a so far, very satisfactory transfer window!


Anonymous said...

why do people constantly talk about this? ManUre have already bought another striker in Nani and are apparantly (with actual news story backing this, not random hearsay) close to signing Tevez. They need another striker why?

Just stop with the stupid Berba stories please.

Harry Hotspur said...

Morning chaps....

There's a storm a brewin'....

Just got an email back fron THFC...

Choosing your own seat has been SCRAPPED and that includes all fixtures, not just friendlies.

I will run a piece on this later today.

Perhaps it's best that's the case so I get the chance to calm down.


Anonymous said...

Considering the new gooner Henry replacement...

To tenacious D Tribute:

"He asked Benty: "Are you West Ham?"
And he said, "Nay. I am a Yid."
Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh-ah-ah,
Ohhh, whoah, ah-whoah-oh!

De Silva ain't the greatest striker in the World
He ain't a worthy Tribute."


Anonymous said...

Considering the gooners replacement of Henry, to the tune of Tenacious D Tribute:

He asked Benty: "(snort) Are you West Ham?"
And he said, "Nay. I am a Yid."
Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh-ah-ah,
Ohhh, whoah, ah-whoah-oh!

De Silva ain't the greatest Striker in the World
He ain't a worthy Tribute!

Anonymous said...

The story comes from someone who works at the admnistrative offices of BUPA, not from any hospital. That's where the medicals are booked. And not all the medicals are done at the same place, by the way.
This doesn't mean that the BUPA clerk is telling the truth. Perhaps he's just having a laugh. A private one and quite stupid, if the event doesn't happen. How will that guy look like to his mates and other staff there if he's telling he booked something he didn't?
I say keep an eye on this. Unless Tevez signs.

Anonymous said...

Nani is a striker? oh, boy! Is Cristiano Ronaldo a striker? Oh, boy! They're both the same, asshole!
If Man U isn't getting Berba, they'll have to get someone else, maybe Tevez, because, unlike Spurs, they do need a striker!

jolsgonemental said...

I can confirm that under the new system supporters will not be able to purchase an exact seat within a block when purchasing tickets on line. I appreciate that some will see this as a potentially negative change to the process but it is an alteration made with good reason.

On our old system, where people were allowed to go in and select specific seats we were almost always left with a large number of single seats to sell before a match was completely sold out. Quite understandably, supporters would not necessarily think to make sure that they did not leave odd seats on their own when they were making their booking. However, it did leave us with issues where people would not bring children because they would obviously not want them to sit alone. All in all it was proving to be a poor experience for supporters who only managed to purchase a ticket towards the end of a sale.

Additionally, it is clear that the ability to select specific seats was lengthening the purchase time on the Web while supporters 'shopped' around for the seats they preferred. This situation undoubtedly contributed to some of the system issues that were experienced in the past in terms of speed and robustness.

The new Ticketmaster system that we now have in place is the same as that used at many of other Premier League clubs and our process in regard to this specific point is now consistent with them. Just to clarify, some supporters who have contacted us have suggested that seats are allocated randomly to them. This is not the case. The seats that are allocated to people booking via the Web are those that are deemed 'best available' at the time they are making their booking. Best Available is defined by the Ticket Office as being back row first and then moving forward in the lower tiers, and front row then moving backwards in the upper tiers. The best seat in a row is always the seat nearest the centre of the pitch.

Obviously, in the event that a supporter does have a need or a desire to have a particular seat they are able to call to book, and in the event that the seat(s) that they want are available they will be able to book them, or as near to it without leaving single seats unsold.

I hope this clarifies this issue. I am sure that supporters will get used to the change as the season progresses.


From: JGM
Sent: 04 July 2007 19:54
To: Ticket Office
Subject: Seating


Your online booking system doesnt seem to be working. I cant select the seat I want to sit at. And I certainly dont want to end up sat next to that bloke at the paxton end with the rattle.

I assume this isnt in preparation for some sort of scheme to make fans pay more for the privilege of sitting somewhere where they can actually get a decent view of the pitch? Although I am in a particularly highly paid job, and can easily afford it, I refuse to be bent over and taken up the arse when I have already paid up my members fee.


jolsgonemental said...

just replied to their mail :

and presumably the tickets we have been 'allocated' will be displayed BEFORE we have to enter payment details? Or do we pay 60quid and hope for the best? how about a lucky dip system, or maybe a raffle?

I dont understand why you are making it hard for the 35950+ fans each game who are happy with the system to make it easier for what must be the (very) small minority who leave it late and are surprised the best seats are gone and so cant sit holding hands.

would it not have been easier to code the booking system to not allow the booking off of seats such that would leave the odd individual seats in between. The Odeon website manages to do this quite comfortably, if their popcorn addled brains can figure out how to do it then cant be hard, surely?

I can see another 'member tier scheme' brewing to squeeze an extra few quid for us mugs, that allows choosing of seats......

Anonymous said...

Harry Hotspur u are an absolute twat.........where's your latest Berba to Utd comments. You would sell Spurs down the river for a few more hits on your sh1te website.

Harry Hotspur said...


And you're a brain damaged monkey... don't forget to take your peanut shells with you and thank them for letting you use a high chair when you leave the internet cafe...

Harry Hotspur said...

Jolsgone mental - going to put your post in the comments for the Ticket Swindle piece tonight... cheers...

Vinny said...

Gotta love Defoe for coming out and giving his commitment to fight for his place...thats the attitude we want to see from every player.

Hopefully now our fantastic 4 strikers will stay together, and my mouth is already watering at the prospect of these 4 top quality players being unleashed.

Part of me was actually worried thanks to knowfuckall and Sofea Jane, but their so called "inside knowledge" tells us now that they're bigger muppets than Uncle Bulgaria from the Wombles himself.

With Kaboul in the bag too, one more top playmaking midfielder or winger would do for me now, preferably Wes Schneider, but then that may be just too good to be true, as things have not been this smooth at Spurs in 20 years...COYS!

Anonymous said...

Man U conduct medicals at Carrington, not BUPA or any other hospitals.

Your mate is winding you up.

Anonymous said...

Kaboul signs. HH right again. Why doubt the great one any longer. Who next KAKA, Riquelme, Tezez, Crouch. We need a plymaker in the midfield, but who will come to the lane HH? Drenthe, yes ok give him a chance, let him settle. I wonder if Adel is going to be the answer and we are looking but nothing is there. Its a theory which is becoming obvious as pre season starts and Robbie returns from Costa del Sol. Does anyone know where big gay Sol is playing next season. I would like to us play the barca system with Lennon and Keane as wide attackers.

Anonymous said...

Berba is staying. Im his wife and lover. We love the Tottenham area and feel at home around Lord Ship. Its such a hot bed of cultures, including the delights of Eastern Europe. Berba feels a little lost with the boys and would appreciate less gangsters. Maybe some nice Eastern lads would cheer the place up

Summerspur said...

Sorry guys its true. My great aunt, Freda payne was indeed in doctor Singe Majeep`s surgery in Salford earlier where she confirmed berbs was seen next in the queue despite his best efforts to hide behind the may 1977 edition of peoples friend.
Some consolation, jens lemon was there having 2 giant chips on his shoulder removed, arsene whinger was having eyesight tested and adebeyor was getting treatment for genital warts.

Anonymous said...

Peter "Lemon Sucker" Kenyon has just said that Chelsea have had no contact with Spurs about Chimbonda and aren't interested in the player.

db said...

apparentley sol 'judas' campbell wants to come back, after he heard some keane bent bloke is playing for spurs !!!

Anonymous said...


you're his wife and...lover? the same person? the man is an idiot!

Anonymous said...

Ok the clear winner of the Darren Bent song was the amy winehouse song so hopefully this wraps it up.

They tried to make me go to west ham and i said no no no

His name is Darren Bent and his a Yiddo o o o

He don't like their Pikey kind
Tottenham will do just fine

They tried to make him go to West ham and he said JOl Jol Jol

I could imagine this over at the lane it going to be funny as fuck

sydney wale said...

Aint nothing going on but the Bent
You gotta drop JD
If you wanna deal with me

Anonymous said...

to the tune of "my eyes have seen the glory"...

the egg man waved his cheque book at darren with a smile

the egg man waved his cheque book at darren with a smile

the egg man waved his cheque book at darren with a smile

and this is what he said


i'm not going to f___ing west ham

i don't sign for feeder clubs

they only like you if your white

and their jellied eels are shite

and i got to meet Younes down the pub

Anonymous said...

you put your argies in,
your argies out,
the iceman came and kicked the gaffer out,
you lost ur carlos tevez and you couldnt get bent,
o, ****y ****y west ham,
o, ****y ****y west ham,
to see mr bent just come down the lane